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Case Study F2 – Parents delima

By Khalid Iqbal – Founder Rahmaa Institute

FORMAT

1. Read the case study with your group, discuss and identify all the issues.
2. In your opinion what seem to be the real issue?
3. Review questions and discuss within the group or as couple.
4. Choose one person from the group to present both parts of the scenarios and group solutions to the issues. As couple respond to the questions independently

 

CASE STUDY:

Asghar came to US about 29 years ago. He married Sadiqa after finishing his studies. They have only one son Ahmed who is now 28 years of age. Ahmed graduated and is now working as an executive in an international telecommunication firm. They supported Ahmed through his university in getting him computer science and MBA degree. They were overjoyed when two years ago Ahmed introduced them to Azra whom he met in the University. Last year Ahmed married Azra in a lavish wedding. Ahmed wanted his parents to pay for all the expenses. Asghar and Sadiqa cashed their retirement fund to help with his education and marriage expenses.

 

Since their house was very close to the Masjid,  Asghar was regular at the masjid for the five daily prayers. Sadiqa also would accompany her husband for Maghrib prayer and would leave after Isha. For the past three months however their frequency of coming to the Masjid dropped as they may not show up for a few days at a time.

 

Last night just before Isha prayers Ahmed dropped his parents at the Masjid with one small suitcase and left. Asghar had multiple bruises visible on his face and hands. The Musaline (prayer goers) got concerned and one brother who was a doctor asked them to go to the hospital after initial examination. Asghar was physically abused by his son and daughter-in-law while he was trying to save his wife from assault. Both refused as that may result in police case against their son Ahmed for parental abuse.

 

The Masjid got them a hotel room for the next couple of days while they find alternative accommodation. Their son and daughter in law grabbed all of their savings and possessions.

 

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

1. How do you feel they should settle the issue?
2. What would you suggest for father and mother to do? Were they right in not seeking medical assistance just to save their son.
3. What would you suggest for Ahmed and his wife?
4. Who is responsible for the issue: parents or son Ahmed or daughter in law?
5. Should parents live with their married children?
6. Should parents get the married children to move out and live on their own
7. Is this an issue of tarbiyah? The parents spoiling their son?
8. Is this an issue of choosing the wrong life partner by the son?
9. Are you aware of any case of parental abuse?