The Benefits of Premarital Counseling with Rahmaa Institute

by: Khalid Iqbal Founder Rahmaa Institute

Posted January 5, 2016 

Creating positive marriage resolutions 

It’s easy to get emotional when discussing heavy-duty topics like family, money, sex, and kids. We help guide the conversation in a positive way and prevent you and your partner from going off on a tangent, thereby losing focus. Our counseling methodology is proven to be nonthreatening as we use fun way of dealing with difficult topics using role plays, scenarios and case studies.

 

Expectations should not lead to disappointments

Life is changing fast dues to technological advancement, instant communication, and world becoming small and accessible. What was a norm back home may not be a norm in the West or where you live now. Weather it is because of experience, hearsay, or culture expectations often lead to disappointments when they are not met by your spouse after marriage, especially on difficult issues. It is best to have things discussed and clarified rather than think it to be a norm.

 

Learning (or improving) conflict resolution skills 

In this fast moving world often with work, home, children, bills, family, friends both partners are busy. So busy that they fail to give each other attention and time. The stress sometimes lead to some major tiffs or blowouts. Instead of reacting negatively during arguments, whether it’s wielding the silent treatment and pouting or yelling and name-calling we offer a session on the guidance from the Quran and from the seerah of Prophet Mohammad SWS how to handle conflict that brings wins for all.

 

Husband and wife obligations and responsibility

These are clearly defined in Islam, knowing and understanding them lead to not only personal satisfaction and harmonious life together but also bring happiness and barakah (blessings) into the home. We make sure that they are clearly defined and discussed.

 

Shura (Consultation) 

Allah SWT and our Prophet Mohammad SWS emphasize shura (Consultation) during all decisions especially major decisions like buying a house or car or when to have kids etc. The examples from the life of our Prophet Mohammad SWS are used to put the point accress.

 

We can help discuss difficult topics

How often have we heard that I wish I had known this before our marriage? Many couples or their parents fail to discuss important topics like domestic violence, anger, bad habits (drinking, gambling, etc.) prior to marriage. We offer to bring all of these on the table in a diplomatic way without offending each party. We find such discussion as beneficial for all parties and prepare them for an honest and tranquil relations.

 

Dismantling fears about marriage from past experience 

One or both of you might come from a divorced family, or from a dysfunctional background where fighting and manipulation was the norm. We spend time to discuss how you how to combat, make peace with your past and break the cycle in your future relationship.

 

Parenting

Allah bless couples with children after marriage. Many couples are not ready or prepared to be good parents in life. They often find what was good for their parents and grandparents may not work in today’s world of social media and instant communication. We emphasize that sometimes you need to “think out of the box” and come up with new ways of dealing with the situation.

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